Yesterday during the sermon time, I used the word “gentleness” to translate the Greek word εὔσπλαγχνος (eusplagchnos) that appears in Ephesians 4:32 where the NRSV translates it as “tender-hearted”.
31Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, 32and be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:31,32)
εὔσπλαγχνος (eusplagchnos) certainly includes the idea of “gentleness, but is more accurately translated as “compassionate”.
During the reflection part of the sermon time, I was asked how I would define the word “gentleness”. It is a big question and deserves more space than I was able to give it in church yesterday.
The Greek word most commonly translated gentleness in the New Testament is πραότης – praotes. It most frequently appears in lists of commendable attributes, where once the NRSV translates it as “meekness”.
the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, 23gentleness (πραότης – praotes) and inner strength. (Galatians 5:22,23)
I therefore, the prisoner in the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:1-3)
As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness,(praotes) and patience. (Colossians 3:12)
24And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kindly to everyone, an apt teacher, patient, 25correcting opponents with gentleness. (II Timothy 2:24,25)
Remind them to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, 2to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show every courtesy to everyone. (Titus 3:1-2)
The problem with lists is that they provide no useful context that is helpful for understanding what the author means by using the word.
There are six other uses of praotes in the New Testament.
In II Corinthians 10:1, Paul uses praotes to describe Jesus.
I myself, Paul, appeal to you by the meekness and gentleness of Christ. (II Corinthians 10:1)
In I Corinthians praotes is used in contrast to a spirit of demanding harshness.
21What would you prefer? Am I to come to you with a stick, or with love in a spirit of gentleness? (I Corinthians 4:21)
Praotes is not a passive word. It describes the attitude with which we might approach a person in need of restoration, and the tone we are encouraged to adopt when called upon to give a defense of our faith. It is also the attitude we are commended to take in performing works of compassion.
My friends, if anyone is detected in a transgression, you who have received the Spirit should restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness. (Galatians 6:1)
Always be ready to make your defence to anyone who demands from you an account of the hope that is in you; 16yet do it with gentleness and reverence. (I Peter 3:15,16)
Who is wise and understanding among you? Show by your good life that your works are done with gentleness born of wisdom. (James 3:13)
Finally, praotes is recommended as the way in which we are to embrace (“welcome”) the word of God that dwells in our being.
21Therefore rid yourselves of all sordidness and rank growth of wickedness, and welcome with meekness (praotes) the implanted word that has the power to save your souls. (James 1:21)
This last usage is the most helpful.
In response to the request to define “gentleness” in the sermon time yesterday, I quoted Ephesians 4:29 where we are instructed to
29Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. (Ephesians 4:29)
Words that “give grace” are words that create space for people to explore more deeply the nature of their true being. They are words that enable people to live authentically. Words that “give grace” are spacious words.
Gentleness is an attitude towards life which enables us to create openings. It provides room for the other to be. Gentleness trusts that, if people open deeply to the presence of God, they will be led into the way of life and truth. Therefore, gentleness does not feel the need to exert pressure or to manipulate. It has nothing to protect, no agenda to promote. It does not need to retaliate, get even, or prove itself right.
Gentleness is not demanding. It does not push or resist. It gives permission for people to discover their true nature and to open to the presence of love at work in their lives. This is why, Paul concludes his list of the fruit of the spirit, which includes “praotes”, with the curious statement that,
There is no law against such things. (Galatians 5:23)
The fruit of the spirit, do not operate in the realm of rules and regulations. They are not amenable to the will. They are not responsive to the determinations of self-will.
Gentleness is a gift given to the heart that is open. The practice of the gift of gentleness creates the openness that is the essential ground in which it will grow. If we want gentleness, we must soften and open. We must let down our guard and approach life with the tenderness that seeks to be sensitive to the realities of life as they are rather than demanding that they be as we would wish they might be.
Gentleness is difficult for us because it feels like weakness. In fact gentleness is a strong quality. We are able to be gentle because we do not feel threatened; we trust the inner strength of God’s Spirit. We can afford to give space to the other, because we have experienced the spaciousness of God’s Spirit in our own lives.
Gentleness is the ultimate sign of deep inner security. It reaches out to life without fear or anxiety because it knows that it is safe. There is nothing stronger than the presence of God’s Spirit dwelling at the heart of our being. Therefore, we are able to live with openness and softness in the midst of whatever circumstances life may provide. The strength of true gentleness will never be diminished by the harshness that characterizes so much of life.
When I practice gentleness, I am in tune with my true self. I am trusting in the flow of God’s Spirit that sustains my life. Gentleness enables me to empower people in my life to connect more deeply with the beauty that is their nature. There is no law, no effort, no exertion of self-will, no determination that has the power to create the beauty that is the inevitable fruit of gentleness.
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August 13, 2012 at 7:49 am
Steve
As I think back on my life, the people I liked the most, the people I most remember are all gentle people as you describe above. They are the people that let you be and in thinking about it to say their words “give grace” is a much richer expression because it puts it in a different context. It is the Word of God made man in a thousand small gestures. It gives us an audio visual aid to understand and internalize the love and grace of God.
August 24, 2012 at 9:19 am
lindsay
Yea, I think I prefer the word ‘gentleness’ to ‘meekness’. ‘Meekness’ suggests passivity and being a doormat whereas gentleness suggests something that comes from greater strength … ‘gentle giant’ comes to mind.
Jesus, he could be allow himself to be gentle because he knew he could call on the ‘big guns’ …. his Father and a ‘host of singing angels’ to get him out of trouble … he made the choice to be gentle instead … seemingly for a greater good … Calling on his Father and an army of angels to sort out the mess by show of force would have been the equivalent of using a nuclear bomb to end a squabble between children … not a fair usage of power … and somewhat counter-productive … even if his intentions were good …
It seems he chose to try to work with the children themselves instead, to empower the children themselves to sort out their own squabbles … it was the harder choice … It’s like he had an angel in his pocket he could call on any time … Or maybe like carrying a nuclear bomb on one shoulder and an angel on the other … he could call on either … choose to utilise the immense power of either directly … but he chose to draw strength from the angel in smaller, manageable quantities … I mean smaller quantities that the children could manage, rather than what Jesus himself could manage …
Okay, I’m rambling … but it seems to me gentleness is more about knowing the appropriate amount of power to use and using only the appropriate amount of power … and knowing how to channel it in a healthy and productive way … and having the self control to do this …. without letting that pesky old ego get in the way …. which in itself is a gift …. It’s like surrender but not complete surrender where you go … “Okay, do whatever you want to do … just leave me out of it” … It’s still staying involved … just in a different way …
Phew! …. Easier said than done, i.e for us mere mortals … but then I guess, that’s why it’s not all only up to us ourselves … we don’t have to try to do it all on our own … It seems gentleness is a different kind of surrender … not the white-flag waving type but something else …
August 26, 2012 at 1:24 pm
lindsay
My father was in charge of quality and safety on the gold mines in South Africa. As part of his portfolio he would ride shotgun on the helicopter to bring the payroll to the mine. For years he would be called in to work around Easter or Christmas time … Security needed all hands available. Factions fighting would start a few days before Easter and Christmas. The Xhosas against the Zulus. The Tswanas or Sothos against the Xhosas. Someone would be killed. Someone would retaliate. It escalated from there. As kids we didn’t know much of the details. Just the bits and pieces of adult conversation we overheard. It was always vicious. The mines would close of Easter and Christmas. Migrant labourers would be laid off and sent home to be with their families. After the Easter or Christmas long weekend, migrant labourers would be signed on again. Agitators were not re-enlisted. Migrant labourers lived in inhumane conditions. The mine compounds were single quarters for men only. Wives and families stayed behind in rural areas tending the land. Compounds were like prison quarters, sterile concrete and steel, barbed wire fences, no privacy. My Dad often went on raid to the hostel to confiscated illegal weapons.
So what’s happening now in South Africa with the shootings at Lonmin Platinum mine in the Rustenburg area of South Africa (near Mafikeng, the birth place of the Boys Scouts and Girl Guides movement arising out of the Boer War – Lord Baden Powell) is close to my heart … violence, poverty, rich resources, exploitation, the rise of the trade union movement, the mines, my Dad … it’s tempting to look for a hero to bring about fundamental change … There has been heroes. There are heroes. … It’s not always clear who real heroes are …. The women? The men? The children?
Interspersed in this poem is the national anthem of South Africa, starting with the last verse and ending with the first verse. It is written in multiple official languages. This anthem reflects the hope of all South Africans I have met … even if our day-to-day actions don’t always appear in sync.
I’ve been trying to figure out what is worse … to put a person in a life-threatening situation where they have no sense of control over whether they live or die or to tell someone they or their situation is hopeless?
We, who are South Africans, are a hopeful people … deep down … even when there appears to be no rational reasons from what we can see around us to hope. Without hope, we are lost …
Lonmin 2012 – Echoes of Sharpville 1960
To Cyril Ramaphosa (58) (South African)
Non-Executive Director – Lonmin and Shanduka, NUMSA and ANC
Cyril Ramaphosa,
National Union of Mine workers (1987),
Majority shareholder of Shanduka (2001),
Amandla! Amandla!
Toyi-toyi or hide!
Through rolling job action
You strike at our economic heart,
“x number of business days” lost,
You unshackled our flag
With demonstrations of marching force.
In our first democratic constitution.
‘Unity is Strength’ became
More than a euphemism.
Sounds the call to come together,
And united we shall stand,
Let us live and strive for freedom
In South Africa our land.
Comrade,
You led united in blood
alongside heroic freedom fighters:
Mandela, De Klerk, Tutu!
Che Guevara!
Amandla! Freedom!
Such high hopes!
Dredged from the bowels of our rich earth,
Uit die blou van onse hemel,
Uit die diepte van ons see,
Oor ons ewige gebergtes,
Waar die kranse antwoord gee.
Ubuntu,
Where are you now
Velvet, negotiator’s voice?
Fat, cat business man,
NUMSA bought
A one percent life,
A luxury sedan.
We cry for all of you,
100 percent.
I am who I am through other people,
Ringing out from our blue heavens,
From our deep seas breaking round,
Over everlasting mountains,
Where the echoing crags resound.
Ubuntu, listen …
We women, we ululate, we lament
44 dead, 78 injured, 200 arrested at last count.
NUMSA corporation, Comrade,
Will you betray us? Will you save our Nation?
Et tu, Julius?
Morena boloka setjhaba sa heso,
O fedise dintwa le matshwenyeho,
O se boloke, O se boloke setjhaba sa heso,
Setjhaba sa, South Afrika — South Afrika.
God, we ask You to protect our nation
Intervene and end all conflicts
Protect us, protect our nation,
Nation of South Africa — South Africa.
Father,
Hear our anguish …
Squalor suffocates this Platinum Treasure Chest.
This is no way to live or grow children,
from a 1-room tin box.
Fifty people share one toilet
We have no water, food is scarce.
Our policemen dying,
Our shop stewards killed,
Hacked to pieces.
Our muti, ineffectual against your flying bullets.
Aikona, Tata.
Yizwa imithandazo yethu,
Nkosi sikelela, thina lusapho lwayo.
Hear our prayers
God bless us, your children.
Marikana Red Hills,
Slave labourers, rock drill operators.
We work so hard for so little,
From dust-to-dust,
You pay for our funerals,
What about our lives?
Eish~
Nkosi sikelel’ iAfrika
Maluphakanyisw’ uphondo lwayo,
God bless Africa
Raise high its glory.
Thou art, I am
August 26, 2012 at 3:33 pm
Steve
Living in one of the wealthiest societies in the world, as I do and thinking about what you just said reminds me of how what we argue and bicker about is so inconsequential when one steps back and looks at the grand perspective which you have just graphically reminded me of. We, in America are a fat, lazy, spoiled, children of rich parents. Our rich parents appreciated what they had because their parents didn’t have it. We take the abundance we enjoy for granted, long since forgotten is the memory of the labors of our forefathers, the lives lost to establish, maintain, and protect our lifestyle. We don’t appreciate what we have because we did not earn it, we did not have to fight for it. We think it is owed to us, we think it is a right. I think a South African mine worker would have a very hard time understanding the so called class struggles we have in the U.S.
We humans are prone towards selfishness and absent the unifying effect of a common struggle of seeking to procure some of the most basic of needs, to establish some semblance of stability in society our selfishness seems to grow like a devastating disease. When overwhelming circumstances preclude anything but a very short term thinking, like how to stay alive, how to find food to eat, how to procure shelter and clothes, there is but one common cause and anyone who would single themselves out as being more deprived than the rest, or to say they are discriminated against, at best would be met with deaf ears and at worse they would likely be stoned to death.
I don’t think the mine workers in South Africa have the luxury of hairsplitting; of being jealous of somebody getting more than somebody else. They don’t have the luxury of even a discussion on civil rights. There are no minorities. What is one person’s problem is everybody’s problem. What is one person’s good fortune is everybody’s good fortune.
In more affluent societies and absent these most basic struggles, some of the less important issues elevate to the top position. The resolution of one issue is the birth of another one until we are fighting, like rich kids, one feeling deprived because he has to eat steak, the other because he has to eat lobster.
Thank you Lindsay for reminding me.
P.S. Bear in mind these words are coming from a political conservative. I do not mean them to bear any resemblance to the liberal rhetoric I hear daily.
August 26, 2012 at 6:29 pm
lindsay
Yea, Steve, I think our countries, US, Canada and South Africa, are not all that different. Human nature is human nature, whether fighting over steak and lobster or a slice of bread. In any country there is a problem when the working poor can’t afford the meet their basic needs. This what is happening in South Africa to me is the ugly side of capitalism. Exploitation of the working poor by the wealthy. The difference, I think, is that in the US jobs (a basic component of productivity) are often shipped off-shore to poorer countries, and South Africa has a cheap (and ‘expendable’ labour force) at home.
But my own leanings are more capitalist and socialist. I don’t believe in massive ‘free handouts’ … I don’t think this is practical or healthy. Even with massive mechanisation and advances in technology, a society suffers if it is run on the efforts of a few. I believe that everyone has the desire and capacity to contribute to society and humanity in a way which is empowering and whatever form of ‘work’ this might take… when everyone’s contribution is valued … I mean really valued, not just lip service … everyone benefits ….
When you were talking about feeling like you live in a war zone in the South, I’ve been thinking about what this means … for the US?
August 26, 2012 at 10:18 pm
lindsay
I was reading psychologist-economist Dan Ariely’s ‘Predictably Irrational’ recently about the hidden forces that shape our decisions … He talks about how we live two worlds: one which is shaped by social exchanges and the other which is shaped by market exchanges and we apply different norms to how we interact. What he was saying which particularly thought provoking, and I think is true, that when we apply market norms into social exchanges we violate social norms and it hurts relationship. And how once this type of mistake has been committed, recovering social relationship is difficult … or takes a long time to recover. Being South African I guess I still hope for something different … I think Ubuntu might have suffered as a result of this … I think the First Nations people and the Church suffered as a result of the financial court settlement between First Nations people and the Church …. It seems as soon as we place a fixed value on anything … suffering, contributions to society, humanity and gentleness suffer as a result …
It seems when we switch from social norms to market norms … we switch from what is natural and intrinsic and of our true nature … ubuntu … to something which is unnatural, extrinsic and rule-bound and snatching … and I don’t know how to bridge the two … except maybe to do like what John the Baptist said “Anyone who has two shirts should share with the one who has none, and anyone who has food should do the same” and Jesus when he said to “Render unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s” … I can’t see any other way to switch from market norms to social norms …
It’s like conservative or liberal, capitalist or socialist … the label doesn’t really matter all that much … it’s what we each of us do with our gifts, knowledge, experiences, deeply held desires that matters more … if we live the life we are meant to live 100%, are passionate about what we do and allow each other the same grace and genuinely value what each other does, then we wouldn’t go wrong, we wouldn’t exploit each other … we wouldn’t objectify each other … it’s like humanity 100% … I’m not sure if this what I’m trying to say makes sense … yes, it sounds ‘airy fairy’ and not very practical, and yet it’s the only thing that makes common sense to me and has immense practical implications … and yes, leaning towards capitalism and Christian radical left is and will likely remain an internal conflict for myself that I will keep finding challenging … it keeps me questioning …. everything …
I guess this is why I am intrigued about what your views are about what’s happening where you live, Steve … it seems to be a bubbling pot … like something broad and organic is happening … I want to ask you how long has it’s been like this that you’ve noticed? Is it getting worse? Does it go in waves? Do you think it could also be related to the recession? The elections? You mentioned people where you live are finding it difficult to adjust to secularism? Why do you think this is? I am also wondering if as you say “In more affluent societies and absent these most basic struggles, some of the less important issues elevate to the top position.” And then I think that maybe it’s a time that people are no longer fighting a war of crime, a cold war, a war against Iraq, a war against terrorism, a war against Wall Street … and maybe as a country when people are starting to realize that there are problems and poverty at home and it’s moving towards self reflection … and alas, blame … I read somewhere that the US soon will be comprised of all minority groups …. Is there something else going on here? How much of a role do you think the media plays in this? …. I know, so many questions …
August 27, 2012 at 10:53 am
Steve
Lindsay,
Some of your statements I don’t understand because I am not familiar with the terms, like Ubuntu, and First Nations people. I am not familiar with the history or state of affairs in South Africa. But that doesn’t matter, I hear what you are saying and the questions you ask are universal. I don’t mean the specific questions about my circumstances, I mean the ones where you look at humanity and try to make sense of what you see. I have much I want to say to you, way too much to express here. Although we live in vastly different circumstances, I think we are alike.
In my case, I find myself caught between two factions who, while not shooting at each other with guns, are shooting at each other with hateful words. I am conservative and Christian but I find that I cannot stand with my own people on many issues, I have been clearly convicted of the wrongness to their beliefs and actions. My love for Christ compels me to stand with “the other side”, people who, truth be known, I don’t like, people who my fundamentalist/evangelical background has conditioned me to think of as moral reprobates. God has made it clear to me they are his children and made in His image, perfectly in His image. He has made it clear it is not my responsibility to change them, to reform them, only to love them as He love me, unconditionally.
So, my conservative Christian friends think of me as a liberal Christian and my liberal friends think of me as one of those narrow minded right wing fanatical conservative Christian nut jobs. I don’t want to tell anyone I’m either Christian or conservative, if I do, they will immediately make assumptions about me that are not true. So, I’ve decided, or maybe I should say been convicted, to not tell anybody, to keep my political and religious beliefs to myself. I will express my religious beliefs through my actions; I will try to have unconditional positive regard for all, no matter what their beliefs are, no matter how repulsive I find them to be. Those are my marching orders.
You speak of social norms and market norms. This is a terminology I am not familiar with even though I think I am familiar with the truths they represent. I think to objectify people and look at them as something that can be managed or manipulated like inventory or cattle is inhumane and does not work, it does not recognize the limitations we humans have, it does not recognize that we are spiritual beings. This is my accusation against progressive liberalism, but that’s a long story.
Perhaps what you refer to as social norms is the equivalent to natural law. It would be represented by the Christian moralists, it is legalism. It recognized the limitations we humans have; it recognizes that we are spiritual beings. But it is tyranny. This is my accusation against the church.
You say you don’t know how to bridge the two. I think you are close to the answer. I don’t know how much you know about the teachings of Jesus but I can tell you that’s where you will find the answer. Read the four Gospels. I can only tell you, just like Jesus says, if you seek you will find.
I am leaving it at that, firstly, because I am running out of time, I have much to do and if I allowed myself I could go on writing all day. Secondly, because I don’t think I can tell you the answer anyway. It is a secret that only can be revealed to you by God. Don’t misunderstand me, it is very simple, it seems like common sense to me now, I don’t know why it took me 35 years to get it. It was right in front of me but I didn’t “see” it. I guess my message to you is that there is an “IT” to get. It is a wonderful, liberating, freeing thing. Every thing starts making sense once you “see”.
August 27, 2012 at 7:50 pm
lindsay
Thank you for your words of encouragement, Steve. Yes, I agree, I think we are alike, though we live in different circumstances … there is so much in what you say that I recognize … I think if we were to meet one day and chat we’d find we have a lot more in common than perhaps we even realize. If you say you’ve been convicted, then so have I … It seems being convicted is not such a bad place to be … we don’t have so far to fall … and there’s a surprising freedom to be found in it …
God-speed, Steve