In most cases, it is not so much making “right” decisions that is most important as it is making our decisions from the right place. It is more about attitude and process than perfect answers.
A “right” decision made from a wrong place will almost always end up causing more harm than a “wrong” decision made with an attitude of integrity, genuineness, honesty, and openness.
Life brings circumstances into our lives to which it is at times tempting to respond with bitterness, resentment, and anger. When I make decisions from this hurt place, I make decisions that create more hurt and violence.
In order to make healthy life-giving decisions for everyone involved I need to face honestly the agendas, needs, wants, and demands I bring to the table. When I feel the need to defend my position, I need to step back for a moment and ask what I am really defending. The more self-aware, honest, and transparent I am, the more likely I will make better decisions.
The best decisions are seldom made in isolation. Our decision-making process is always stronger when it is undertaken with respectful consultation.
Good decision-making starts with good listening. We need to ask: What is really going on here? Good listening requires an attitude of openness and receptivity.
Alone I do not have all the information and every insight that may be necessary to make the best decision. There are other voices. Perhaps most of all, I need to hear voices that may appear to disagree with what I believe to be the best way forward. I will not be driven to inaction by considering different positions. When I listen to those who see things differently, my decision-making process is deepened and strengthened by having to confront other points of view.
We live in an enormously complex world. It is often difficult to see clearly. My decision-making process is always enhanced when I acknowledge, “I do not understand.” When I acknowledge that I do not know the best way forward, I open to a deeper way of knowing that the ancient traditions call wisdom.
There are few if any perfect decisions. The best we can usually do is find the least damaging choice.
Good decisions take time and patience. Our best decisions are seldom rushed. We need to avoid going for the quick fix and instead seek the deep wisdom that resides within our being and that we access by opening our hearts and listening to our deepest intuitions and insights.
The energy of urgency is unlikely to provide a strong basis from which to make good decisions. Urgency tends to create clenching and tightness. Good decisions come from a place of opening, softening, and gentleness.
Given how quickly life’s circumstances change, I do well to always sit lightly to the direction I have chosen. I may need to shift my position at any moment. After having decided on a particular course, I need to have the humility to acknowledge that the choice I made is perhaps not the best and shift in the direction to which I was at one time opposed. This is not a sign of weakness. Being willing to acknowledge error and make a course correction is a sign of strength and wisdom.
Ultimately, I make better decisions when I acknowledge the limitations of my ability. I am not in control of the universe.